So you’re thinking about face farming (growing a beard)? You definitely don’t want to be a skin chin forever, but there are so many unknowns!
Will your beard be Duck Dynastylin’, or a scruffy Bieber Beard?
Perhaps your beard turns out to be a GEARD (Ginger Beard)!
Your deepest hope is that you will be able to grow an epic beard that will make other men swoon with BEARD ENVY! If you are contemplating the idea, even just a little, BEARD UP! Stop procrastinating! Just Do It!
Rule #1 – When in Doubt, Grow it Out!
My first beard attempt was ghastly. If I had only known then what I know now, there would have been no cause for the beard shaming I received!
Fast forward to the present where I have evolved into a finely tuned Beardologist. I’ll share a few tips that will prevent you from the same shame, and without a doubt, will help you grow out your beard.
Whether you want to look like a Lumbersexual (ruggedly sensual bearded man in jeans and flannel), a Beardster (a hipster with a beard), or sport a lengthy chin pelt worthy of ZZ Top, these tips will help you become an epic bearded man.
Ditch the Itch
Ever hear of the Bruce Springsteen beard? It’s when you have a 4-5 day break from work and grow some serious stubble. The Bruce Springsteen beard is more than stubble, but not quite a beard. Please believe me when I say you want to get past this stage as fast as possible. Ditch the itch before you go completely loco!
Growing out a beard is not for the weak. This phase can last 2-3 weeks! Ugh! No wonder there are so many clean-shaven faces out there. Hang in there! Follow my advice and you’ll soon see your beard fill out into a glorious chin pelt.
The best strategy to handle this awkward and uncomfortable stage is to acquaint yourself with beard oil. Yep, they make special oil just for beards. Beard oil will hydrate your beard AND your skin. My #1 choice is NORTHERN FIR BEARD OIL. Use this BEARD OIL and before you know it, you’ll be sporting bearded excellence.
NORTHERN FIR BEARD OIL’s secret is jojoba oil. This oil is your ACE IN THE HOLE. It won’t leave you feeling greasy like many oils do. Give it a few minutes to soak in. You will be impressed at how nice your skin and beard feel! The best part is No More Itching! This stuff is ON POINT!
Shed the Dead
Exfoliating isn’t just for the fairer sex anymore. If you want that beard to grow fast and full, you NEED to exfoliate. These little scrubbing beads will scour off dead skin cells and clean out your pores. Choose a mild exfoliant, not too coarse. You don’t want your face to feel like you battled with a brillo pad. Your goal is smooth and polished, not dry and irritated.
Exfoliating is a CRUCIAL step in growing out your beard. Keep your skin healthy, and free from blemishes or ingrown hairs. The best way to do this is to scrub your beard area with this gritty face wash every 2-3 days.
Clean and Preen
Nobody wants to see what you had for dinner hanging out in your beard. Saving it for later is just nasty! Wash your beard regularly keeping it clean and free from beard boogers. You should wash your FACE twice a day, but only wipe down your beard with a wet washcloth.
Absolutely DO NOT shampoo your beard every day. Beard hair is more coarse and dry than the hair on your head. Shampooing every day will dry it even more.
DO NOT use bar soap on your beard, unless you want a case of BEARDRUFF (dry skin or dandruff in your beard).
I have found using NORTHERN FIR BEARD OIL after a shower is the best time to indulge. Remember, a little bit goes a long way. Depending on how much beard growth you have, you may need anywhere from 2-8 drops. Just rub your hands together making a thin layer on your palms. Then massage oil into your beard for some smooth and silky wonderment.
It’s time to discuss Beardiculture – the art of beard grooming and maintenance.
Why should you trim your beard if you are still growing it out? It doesn’t make sense – cut it to grow it? Yes! Beard hair has split ends that make your beard appear scruffy or scraggly. Even using beard oil daily will not keep the ends from splitting.
They will split higher and higher up the shaft of hair making your beard look worse by the day. These split ends will actually slow down your beard growth! We can’t have that! A slight trim about once a month will stop the split ends in their tracks.
There will come a day when you decide to trim more than just the ends. Perhaps you want to eliminate the UNIBEARD – when the chest hair merges with neck hair making one continuous flow of hair from face to chest with no distinction.
Perhaps you just want to style it a little and not look like Chewbacca.
I urge you to spring for a professional trim to avoid Bearder’s Remorse. This phenomenon is when you attempt a trim event and make a fatal error forcing you to shave it all off rather than bear the shame of failure! Until you learn some techniques to avoid this tragedy, consider having someone else do the shaping and trimming for you.
I mentioned earlier that NORTHERN FIR BEARD OIL is made from jojoba oil. It also has argan and grapeseed oils, cold pressed and harvested in the deserts of Arizona.
A masculine and woodsy whiff reminds you of hiking in crisp mountain air. Slight hints of sandalwood, cedarwood, black pepper, and juniper berries temper the scent just enough to keep it subtle.
With these tips for growing a beard and a little bit of time and patience, your beard will be something to behold, the object of beard envy, a magnet for the true pogonophile (a true lover of beards).