Does that sound familiar? If it does, then whether you’re a man or a woman, you might be a true blue lover of the beard. The formal word for it is a pogonophile, but that’s a bit of a mouthful. (It comes from Greek, and let’s face it, there’s a reason we say that complicated things are “Greek to us.”)
It’s okay though – you don’t have to use that word. You can just go ahead and call yourself a beard-lover, and nobody will judge you.
Now let’s go ahead and look at the eight signs that you might be a true beard-lover.
You Don’t Mind Beard-Related Discomfort
It requires patience to grow a beard. You have to be willing to put up with some itching and discomfort – and if you’re in a relationship with a bearded guy, then you might also have to cope with a bit of beard burn.
If you’re a true beard-lover, it won’t matter – not even a little bit. You’ll put in the time it takes to get your beard looking great, and if you’re kissing someone with a beard, you’ll just invest in some soothing cream (Blistex?) to get rid of that burn between kisses.
You’ll Shell Out for Great Beard Products
A great beard is an investment. When you love your beard, you don’t mind paying out for the best beard balm or beard oil. It doesn’t matter if it’s pricey as long as it smells good and helps your beard look its best.
And if you love a bearded man, you’re always on the lookout for new products for him to try. You’ll bookmark pages on your computer or spend hours at the mall sniffing every beard product you can find. There’s nothing wrong with it – you’re just a pogonophile!
You Don’t Bother to Hide Your Bias for Men with Beards
Do you perk up when an actor who’s normally clean-shaven shows up for an interview sporting a beard? Do you suddenly find that you’re eager to see his new movie even if the premise doesn’t appeal to you that much?
If you’re nodding your head in agreement, then you’ve got an undeniable beard bias. You want to support them in all their hairy glory because hard work should be rewarded.
Nothing wrong with that. Go ahead and buy that movie ticket, tune into the show that celebrates facial hair, and break out your collection of ZZ Top CDs. Beards are meant to be admired – and it’s your job to admire them!
You Have Reliable Beard Radar
When you’re at a crowded party, do you sense the moment when a magnificent beard enters the room? Some people do. It’s like there’s a disturbance in the force that only an impressive, perfectly maintained beard could create.
You turn around and there it is. The beard you’ve been waiting for. You don’t know how you knew it had arrived, but you did. All you can think about is going over to talk to the guy who owns that beard so you can hear what he has to say. About beards… about life… about anything.
And that means that your love for the beard is unsurpassed.
A Beautiful Beard Makes You Lose Control
Have you ever found yourself buying a product you didn’t want or need simply because the salesman was rocking an awesome beard? It’s okay, you can admit it.
A great beard can hypnotize you – make you forget who you are and why you’re here. It can convince you to do things you wouldn’t otherwise do.
There’s no guilt here, just an admission that beards are powerful things. They beg to be admired – and if you have to spend a little money to admire one, no big deal.
Beard Admiration is Part of Your Daily Routine
This is a big one. It’s one thing to sense when a great beard is around, but are you so crazy about beards that you’ll go out of your way to see one?
For example, have you had to take a detour on your way to work, noticed a construction worker with an impressive beard, and then taken that route even after the detour ended just to see it again?
Or have you given up on watching sports with few beards like golf in favor of watching lumberjack competitions and ice hockey just because the players often have impressive facial hair?
There’s nothing wrong with it. You want to see what you want to see – and beards are what you want to see. Around here, we get it. In fact, we encourage you to go ahead and indulge your beard obsession.
If you have exhibit even one of these signs, it’s a sure-fire sign that you’re a beard-lover. Or a pogonophile if you feel like being fancy about it.
Either way, you’re here for the beards. And that is a beautiful thing.
P.S: If This is your first time welcome to North American Beard Alliance!